Attack Cat

From our many anecdotes and stories about Ferris' behavior with company, it should be no different when the Traveling Tax Man arrives, right? It was a nice evening out as dusk was starting to settle so as the Tax Man was setting up, we had the windows and the slider open. Ferris, never about to miss out on an opportunity to try and squeeze through the screen to get outside, was in the kitchen doing just that when he got distracted by the Traveling Tax Man's bag and began inspecting it.

Traveling Tax Man was very indulging as he stated he had a cat, too. Which is why Ferris probably felt compelled to rub his body all over Traveling Tax Man's belongings including his pants, legs and shoes. Ferris had a firm hold of Traveling Tax Man's legs with both front paws while he buried his face in the man's shoe laces. At one point, Ferris had his ENTIRE HEAD UP THE MAN'S PANTS.

Traveling Tax Man simply just laughed it off, but if it were me, I think I'd feel somewhat violated...

Crack pipe

Ferris, like any other cat, goes through something most other cat owners call, "the evening crazies". You know what this is, right? The quentissential cat Tuerrets where one minute, they'll be languidly curled up in a furball donut or demurely tongue bathing and the next, they're balls out, claws out, ears back, tail straight as board and fluffed like a bottle brush, taught and springing into the next room rightthissecondnowoutofmyway! Only, with Ferris there are two distinct times he's like this. Well, actually three. 1) Right after he uses his toilet (he's suddenly lighter and spunkier), 2) when he thinks he's getting to go outside and 3) pretty much all the times in between.

This is something we'd thought he'd grow out of. Like 9 years ago. But no. He's as spastic as he ever was as a kitten. Sometimes he'll attack you completely unwarranted if you're sitting on the floor watching TV. Other times he'll grab the floor like it's spinning uncontrollably under him and he bounce down the hall way, tearing around the corners were you can hear him ripping the carpet out with is claws. Sometimes, when he's particularly frustrated at being cooped up inside the house he'll take those frustrations out on the pillows and his head will spin like Blair on the Exorcist and he'll kick the crap out of the pillows with his hind feet.

Kind of like this:

This is a picture of a picture. We haven't really been able to duplicate a picture since - you have to move quick around him when he's in these moods. We kid that the thing he's holding is his crack pipe he's taking a hit off - hence the wild demon spawn eyes and turned back ears like balor horns. But it's actually the attachment to the vacuum cleaner, which is funny becasue he's deathly afraid of it. The vacuum, not the attachment, obviously.  But in essence, this is right before his head spins off his shoulders ala Linda Blair.

Fort Ferris

Ferris has, ever since he was little, a thing for enclosures. Like most cats, you'd think - but not this furball. Most cats love paper bags because of the noises it makes inside and out, and from the inside it's a safe little cubby hole from which to pounce unsuspected bystanders.  Most cats love boxes for the same reason, or it provides warm security to sleep in.  Most cats love plastic bags because it makes crazy noises and they can attack it and play with it and make crazier noises! Ferris? He'll pee in it. A box, a bag, a hut made for kitties, even pet beds - he'll pee in it. Not spray, just simply pee in it like a dog marks his territory.

Ferris' idea of a fort is anything made from stacked pillows, to a draping afghan, to clothes that are dripping out of the hamper.  This is where he hides and lays in wait for his next unsuspecting victim. This is where he sits, haunches poised, eyes wide and glowing, face alert to launch from like a tightly wound spring, like the inner predatory tiger he is, to shred his prey to bits.

Teased

Ferris wants out.

Neener Neener!

Yak, yak and more yak.

We immediately jerked out of any projectile vector and Vin turned on the lamp and just in time to see a glob of semi-digested kibble and bile slide down the headboard and onto the Vin's pillow.

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